Patriots player Kayshon Boutte opens up about his gambling addiction in an essay

New England Patriots football wide receiver Kayshon Boutte wrote a moving essay remembering his gambling addiction in the hope that this helps someone else going through the same thing.

Titled ‘How the hell did I get here?the essay begins by explaining that at age 20, when he had a full scholarship to LSU and his future was ahead of him, he began his days in bet.

“I would get up late and I would bet. All day. All night. I had insomnia, so if I woke up in the middle of the night, on the phone next to the bed, I would bet. Any little money I had, it went straight to FanDuel.”

I share my story with @PlayersTribune in hopes this helps someone else going through the same thinghttps://t.co/p2qENUAOUf

– Kayshon Boutte (@KayshonBoutte1) January 7, 2026

He explained how he knew he was addicted, explaining how he would be in his own world on his phone: “Lying in bed, in the dark, in pain, with the light shining on my face. It was a lonely experience. Like you in an empty casino, alone at the blackjack table.

“Adding more money into the account, and more money, and more money, by pressing a few buttons. You lose touch with reality. You get to a point where it feels like the money isn’t even real. But it is real, because in the real world I was living paycheck to paycheck. I was waiting for the NIL checks to clear.”

Kayshon Boutte Says He Lived Paycheck to Paycheck in Gambling Essay

The athlete said he invested $90,000 of his own money in I gambled and lost everythingwith an ankle injury that led to depression. When he felt like he had lost his identity because he could no longer play football while injured, he turned to gaming.

“That’s how I ended up going down a dark road. That’s how I ended up pacing around my apartment at 3 a.m., betting on everything I could bet on at that time of night. I don’t even know… Honestly, it didn’t matter. You just get caught up in the cycle.”

Two things would have saved the man: one was being able to play football again and the other was becoming a father while he was a university student. He says he owes everything to the Patriots organization, while asserting that they stuck by him even though they could have just walked away.

In an effort to help those currently struggling, Boutte concluded with: “So if I have one message for the football world, I guess it’s this: Don’t give up on these kids, man. I know there are other stories like mine. The bets are going to continue to get bigger and bigger. The game is what it is. I’m not here to preach. It’s going to exist. But the people who are in a dark place, they will use it to escape. Athletes, in particular. I’m telling you this because I’ve experienced it.

Speaking at a New England Patriots conference after the release, Boutte added: “Yeah, it was hard to admit that I needed help. When you’re addicted to something, no matter how much you know you need help, you always tend to come back to the same thing.

“I sent it out two weeks ago and had time to go back and look at it. It felt good to get it all out. A few people told me it was a good opinion. I heard it around the building a little bit. I thought it was pretty cool.”

Many took to social media to leave words of thanks and express their support for the player, following post X sharing the article which received almost 800,000 views.

Featured Image: Credit to New England Patriots via YouTube/Canva

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